how did things turn out to be this ugly. how did a sweet dream became a nightmare? now thinking bout it, since when? since when did htings became so bad that i dont even want to accept that it was that way. since when the excitment, passion, love, enthusiasim become dreadness and hatred? i love it for wad it used to be, really. really really really. my life revolves around it and i dint care wad others said about it..i was proud to be part of it. nothing but pride and passion. now, i find myself keep trying to convince myself that its all worth it. i know that i cant, isnt, and is never going to give up. somehow, it seems to be a responsibility. or maybe, i dont know. ' one day, you will believe it was all worth the while' or smth like that. really?
i will give anyhting to go back..
can we all stop. just stop, take a step back, and understand. the way you're doing it, we cant understand. not even when we're trying. yes, we're trying. we really are. you know how hard it is, the very few here whos holding it all up for so many others.. we're doing so cos we now truly understand how hard it is to do smth that you absolutely have no interest in, or even hate. we understand how they feel so we know its not their fault. and i believe, all of us who are holding it up here, we're doing it not for all the points or whatever positions that we've all heard so much about.. its for, for me its for wad it used to be. i believe theres a fairy tale out there and if we try hard enough, it will come back. do you know, how many times we broke down, how many times we had to tell each other: its okay, its not your fault, or: we can do it, cos we're all in this together and we're all be there for one another. can you rmb that we're humans, ppl who make mistakes. give us some room and some time..you dont see the effort we put in but can you jus trust us, its there. instead of being prejudiced, come and understand and see stuff frm our pt of view and feel our whirlwind inside.
take facts instead of opinions. sometimes you know, wad you see isnt really wad it is. you say we dont care. but we do. so much so that everyhting you say has hurt us. if youall meant it to be hurtful, okay you succeeded. how many times we got together and keep thinking and thinking through wad you say. buut somehow, it always end in anger and confusion. we keep suan-ing youall as well, but right now, we realised and we know we should stop. and see things frm your point of view as well. and see wad we dont see. can you do that as well?
take all that fake mask off and see through one another, then to SOAR AS ONE.
you know you can, if you try. we know you're supposed to wear that mask for htat whatevers sake but take it off a while, can you try?
right now, i hate you. im sorry.
but im giving hatred up for smth more worth my while to keep. i want that fairytale back. i heard that things were even more beautiful last time. and i wanna hear more. but more than that, i wanna creat it again.
re-ignite that passion in us all.
Saturday, October 15, 2005
Thursday, October 13, 2005
haha heh some of you wanted this right..paiseh for taking so long..here it is..the poem from poc05.=)
Thankyou for
Being in our lives
The paths crossed so briefly
Yet we wont forget
Thankyou for being here
To show us what seniors are
People who care
People we can count on
You showed us friends
Are not just to have fun with
But much more, those
We braved through all together
Cried together
Laughed together.
You told us to reach for the stars
Where the dreams lie
To believe, to pray
Having the courage to achieve
Having the faith to give in all
Then taking failures as motivation
To try till we succeed
You inspired us
Like angels from above
Our world lighted with your warmth
With your enthusiasm
You are not a passing scenery
From the windows of our lives
Because
You leave footprints in my heart
ohmann my com's weird..like everything on screen will turn out checkered and all the colours are wrong so haha i have no idea wad colour i jus used..cos all i see is black and white and grey and blue and red hahah yeaheverything looks so weird!
Thankyou for
Being in our lives
The paths crossed so briefly
Yet we wont forget
Thankyou for being here
To show us what seniors are
People who care
People we can count on
You showed us friends
Are not just to have fun with
But much more, those
We braved through all together
Cried together
Laughed together.
You told us to reach for the stars
Where the dreams lie
To believe, to pray
Having the courage to achieve
Having the faith to give in all
Then taking failures as motivation
To try till we succeed
You inspired us
Like angels from above
Our world lighted with your warmth
With your enthusiasm
You are not a passing scenery
From the windows of our lives
Because
You leave footprints in my heart
ohmann my com's weird..like everything on screen will turn out checkered and all the colours are wrong so haha i have no idea wad colour i jus used..cos all i see is black and white and grey and blue and red hahah yeaheverything looks so weird!
Monday, August 15, 2005
Sunday, August 07, 2005
poc2005
after tomorrow, everything will change .just like last year. for the better or the worse?
ncos wont be there anymore.
sec3s will take overas ncos.
WE will become sec3s.
sec1s will become sec2s.
its scary larh..poc04 seems like jus last week kind of thing..how did time mangage to fly so fast without my noticing it? will next year pass as fast too? then the next then whooosh we're out of redcross..abit the early larh but hmphh time flies. its scary..its scary when things changes just whe you think you can cope with it..then it just keeps on changing and changing and changing. but i wanna cling on to those times..those times last year which are longlong gone. can i freeze time? it'llbe cool.it'll be the best machine on planet earth!
ncos wont be there anymore.
sec3s will take overas ncos.
WE will become sec3s.
sec1s will become sec2s.
its scary larh..poc04 seems like jus last week kind of thing..how did time mangage to fly so fast without my noticing it? will next year pass as fast too? then the next then whooosh we're out of redcross..abit the early larh but hmphh time flies. its scary..its scary when things changes just whe you think you can cope with it..then it just keeps on changing and changing and changing. but i wanna cling on to those times..those times last year which are longlong gone. can i freeze time? it'llbe cool.it'll be the best machine on planet earth!
Sunday, July 03, 2005
hahaha so cool now my blog is like so abandoned by me larh but haha okaee now im gonna make it even deader. i, teo mun ching hereby announce that im going to abandon my blogg until like december hols? so yes no need to drop by here anymore heh if you srill happen to cos i dun think anything will still appear here for the time being..unless eh i ve got smthg to share and haha cant resist the urge to come here. haha got kind of freaked out by wad msheng said about bloggs like wad you write here can actually get you to court and stuff and that tchrs actually go to bloggs to read. like whoaa for a moment i was like eh hahah dunno alrh but i always thought that blogs are somewhere for ppl to spill out their emotions and stuff dintt hink that there'll be so many implications. haha and that day which msheng had i talk with us i wanted to go home and blog about a tchr then aft she said that i was like better not.
was watching the charity show jus now..when they showed images of those two kids down with cancer my heart totally jus dropped. its super unfair. hey like they re only children..one only in P1.. they dint even do anything wrong..wad did they do to deserve this? why is it that some ppl are given healthy bodies and really the best environment they can ever have and they nvr treasure it? aiyohh some even worse..cos of some reallyreally minor probs they end their lives. irony..hah i like talking about ironic stuff. if they dont want their lives give it to those kids larh..or better still before you die rite donate ure heart kidney liver whatever so that at the very least your death got meaning. see them struggling for their lives..their own future dimming and their dreams turning into nthg in front of their own eyes..very poor thing leh. so yes morale of the story..if you see those images you'll def know what i mean..treasure life. live it to the fullest of the fullest until cannot be fuller anymore. life is like haha i noe! our redcross coke bottles! everyone has the same standardization stuff and its wad you put inside that matters. you can either fill it to the brim or life it empty. actually this example not very good larh cos eveyrone has to fill it to the brim. but yarh if you have it, why not make full use of it? if you are so blessed, why not rejoice and treasure it? and life will be more fun that way too! its not what you have in life that matters its wad you see in life. if you think it it, it is. yes i suddenly feel veryveyr happy aft makin this statement haha i feel like jumpin round the hse but heh cannot larh cos my mum will think ive gone bonkers and the nxt thing i noe i ll be in woodbridge!
hah cool eh msheng say can write about birds and flowers in bloggs but haah im writng about coke bottles! aiayhh bloggs are dangerous larh. like everybody can see wads written here. actually rite blog is my super censored version of my paper diary. in my paper diary eveyrthing is written in there yes like everyhting..all my happiest stuff and all the dearest ppl and all my embarrasing stuff as well. but here arh by the time i sign in go to the create i forget wad i want to say already..bahh. but its a nice place to share stuff! esp when im feeling very philosophical..eh correct sp? correct usage? haha anw then i can crap all my new-gotten logics and philosophies so that haha i can save those around me the pain of listening to all those. haa see im so nice so considerate to ure ears.
um poc on 8th aug. so near. now when i think about junecamp it seemed liek smthg which happened months ago..then when i think about last yrs poc it seemed to be jus yesterday. bahh sheesh sec3s lehh..veryvery old already. i still, in acertain way, feel like a sec1. or someone whos jus became sec2. it seems so impossible so far away..like hahahah we also can be sec3s arh? so weird. we re gonna become those ppl whom we used to look up to soo much. we re gonna be liek them..whnhy does it seemed so impossible? and so funny! it doesnt fit in! and wad will things be like aft they leave? and wad kind of sec3s will we become? veryscary.
gahh my paer diary jus finished. my last entry was really nice and so bursting with emotions. i think nxt time when i become an old grandmama im gonna become i really happiee one cos i got so much stuff from my childhood years to teen years to maybe afulthood to read. but aiayhh cannot find any nicee diaries! must be thick and green and a5 size and the lines must be thin enough to hold a lot alot of words on a page. gahh cannot find! got green one then not thick then got thick one then not green. haha ooh its cool larh like all along i bought all my daires without realisin that they are all green then it was only this year then i realised..quite impressed with myself. so now must keep up the green traidtion. haha.
okaee i think my fingers are really tired now. so is my brain. officially brain-dead. haha written my fill..to last me for 3 months until the nxt time i come again. hahah -yawns- seeyou! byeeee. =)
was watching the charity show jus now..when they showed images of those two kids down with cancer my heart totally jus dropped. its super unfair. hey like they re only children..one only in P1.. they dint even do anything wrong..wad did they do to deserve this? why is it that some ppl are given healthy bodies and really the best environment they can ever have and they nvr treasure it? aiyohh some even worse..cos of some reallyreally minor probs they end their lives. irony..hah i like talking about ironic stuff. if they dont want their lives give it to those kids larh..or better still before you die rite donate ure heart kidney liver whatever so that at the very least your death got meaning. see them struggling for their lives..their own future dimming and their dreams turning into nthg in front of their own eyes..very poor thing leh. so yes morale of the story..if you see those images you'll def know what i mean..treasure life. live it to the fullest of the fullest until cannot be fuller anymore. life is like haha i noe! our redcross coke bottles! everyone has the same standardization stuff and its wad you put inside that matters. you can either fill it to the brim or life it empty. actually this example not very good larh cos eveyrone has to fill it to the brim. but yarh if you have it, why not make full use of it? if you are so blessed, why not rejoice and treasure it? and life will be more fun that way too! its not what you have in life that matters its wad you see in life. if you think it it, it is. yes i suddenly feel veryveyr happy aft makin this statement haha i feel like jumpin round the hse but heh cannot larh cos my mum will think ive gone bonkers and the nxt thing i noe i ll be in woodbridge!
hah cool eh msheng say can write about birds and flowers in bloggs but haah im writng about coke bottles! aiayhh bloggs are dangerous larh. like everybody can see wads written here. actually rite blog is my super censored version of my paper diary. in my paper diary eveyrthing is written in there yes like everyhting..all my happiest stuff and all the dearest ppl and all my embarrasing stuff as well. but here arh by the time i sign in go to the create i forget wad i want to say already..bahh. but its a nice place to share stuff! esp when im feeling very philosophical..eh correct sp? correct usage? haha anw then i can crap all my new-gotten logics and philosophies so that haha i can save those around me the pain of listening to all those. haa see im so nice so considerate to ure ears.
um poc on 8th aug. so near. now when i think about junecamp it seemed liek smthg which happened months ago..then when i think about last yrs poc it seemed to be jus yesterday. bahh sheesh sec3s lehh..veryvery old already. i still, in acertain way, feel like a sec1. or someone whos jus became sec2. it seems so impossible so far away..like hahahah we also can be sec3s arh? so weird. we re gonna become those ppl whom we used to look up to soo much. we re gonna be liek them..whnhy does it seemed so impossible? and so funny! it doesnt fit in! and wad will things be like aft they leave? and wad kind of sec3s will we become? veryscary.
gahh my paer diary jus finished. my last entry was really nice and so bursting with emotions. i think nxt time when i become an old grandmama im gonna become i really happiee one cos i got so much stuff from my childhood years to teen years to maybe afulthood to read. but aiayhh cannot find any nicee diaries! must be thick and green and a5 size and the lines must be thin enough to hold a lot alot of words on a page. gahh cannot find! got green one then not thick then got thick one then not green. haha ooh its cool larh like all along i bought all my daires without realisin that they are all green then it was only this year then i realised..quite impressed with myself. so now must keep up the green traidtion. haha.
okaee i think my fingers are really tired now. so is my brain. officially brain-dead. haha written my fill..to last me for 3 months until the nxt time i come again. hahah -yawns- seeyou! byeeee. =)
Monday, June 06, 2005
CHINA ROCKS CHINA ROCKS CHINA ROCKS! hahah ohman you noe wad, nxt time when i grow up and earn a lot lot of money im goin to move to qingdao in china and buy a nice cosy apartment there and stay there. haha yes thats how much china rocks. okae maybe except the food..eh at first it was quite okae but aft like erms 9 days developed this phoebia for china food. but the food at qingdao is hte best..had so much seafood..shanghai is not bad too..most of the time we went to like high-class restaurants and get served quite well there. ohoh theres this very amusing restaurant in shanghai where the waitress were all on blades..damn cool hahahha..really shld have seen them ..everytime we want to go to the toilet we have to like look left look right before we walk. eh how did i went to the food part..okaee nemind i think the ppl at my eating table are veryvery amusing..all our amusing conversations hahah everyone will laugh while eating..its a verygood thing cos when you laugh you take up energy and when that happens yo0u can eat more! my grp ppl are super nice too..very spastic and funny. sometimes at night we'll gather in nicoles room then watch hahah chinese serials then ppl will see some guy then they will start hitting the pillow and do funny stuff hahah. the school we went to for the immersion programme..well the ppl there are really nice you noe they made this BANNER for us then the principal and vice-principal came over to welcome us and on the way up to the room then lined up on both sides and started claapin for us as we walked pass them..felt like some sort of vip alien from mars. haha everywhere we go there are the students staring at us..and the guys there are weird! like veryvery weird. hahahaha. laoshi was very nice..though our grp is like always late and always the most unprepared one shes always so amazingly patient..she l;ook so fierce but acutally shes really really mild! haha everytime also tuosiao. haha so many things happened..so many happy memories..aiayhh dun wanna type it all out here..yawns. eh lets do it again! CHINA ROCKS CHINA ROCKS CHINA ROCKS!
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